Apostrophe

Itchy can get in a right pickle when it comes to apostrophes, mainly because a lot of people these days seem to treat the little blighters less like pickles and more like salt and pepper, liberally sprinkling them all over everything they write with wild abandon. It drives us barmy. We break out in a swotty sweat over signs saying 'Taxi's' and 'Kevs Removal's'. We shriek like geeks about menus offering 'Christma's Dinner' (seriously - it was on a chalk board at the pub next door to Itchy Towers). The one type of Apostrophe we're not worried about, however, is the chain of French-inspired caffs. You'll find them seasoning eleven little spots around London Taahn, including the smart Brunswick Centre in WC1. Despite the postcode, we couldn't see a loo inside this branch, but the only reason we were looking is that we'd downed so much of the lemon- and mint-infused water dotted about in iced jugs for you to freely help yourself. We'd also worked our way through a deliciously smoky cappuccino and some red berry tea that looked like pot pourri but brewed a light, fruity pot pour-y. All this liquid did put the 'adder' in 'bladder' though, and in the end we had to whap out our snakes and release the constriction in the bog next door at Starbucks - and in comparison to Apostrophe, this was about all the place was good for.

Actually pronounced the Gallic way - 'Apostroff' - our hot pink-signed favourite weighs in a tad cheaper than the bottle-green monster brand, and although it's still on the pricy side for a quick lunch, the food is top of its game. Your coppers get you interesting sarnie fillings like turkey and creme fraiche or sundried tomato and artichoke, all on fresh bread with intriguingly tasty bits of stuff baked into it. There are also croissants, killer pains aux chocolat (the 'pain' bit kicking in after you've wolfed down four of them), teeny quiches, tarts, cakes, and these fudgey, sticky cocoa slice thingummies that we can't quite describe other than with a spellbound gurgling sound. You can perch outside or tuck yourself in a cool, airy, slate and wood-lined nook. Beware, however, that they've tried to make the itsy bitsy inside look bigger with mirrors. Itchy chatting away obliviously to our own reflection for quite some time about how we liked the free wifi and pots of marmalade on the tables. At least we could hear ourselves chatting though; whilst the Titanic-esque pan pipe background music is a little cheesey, there's a refreshing absence of ear-splittingly loud coffee machine whistles and shouting from the friendly, calm staff.

Apostrophes in grammar often stand in for missing letters, but there doesn't seem to be much missing here. They have tea down to a T, and lunch is grade A. Go and C.

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